


Mistletoe Truce

by BrilliantLady



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Asgardian Culture (Marvel), Bisexual Tony Stark, Christmas, Dubious Consent, FrostIron - Freeform, Honeypot, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Intersex Loki (Marvel), M/M, Make the Yuletide Gay, Minor Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers, Mistletoe, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Other, Post-Civil War (Marvel), Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-23
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:21:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 14,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21916687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrilliantLady/pseuds/BrilliantLady
Summary: A mistletoe truce is sacred to Asgardians and Loki is obliged to be a polite guest instead of wreaking havoc as planned, while Tony must play the role of protective and considerate host. The truce must, of course, be sealed with a kiss. Or maybe two or three. Tony really should’ve stopped at one, because now he’s caught Loki’s attention.
Relationships: Loki/Tony Stark
Comments: 42
Kudos: 375





	1. The Duties of a Host

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Holdt](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Holdt/gifts).



> Prompt: "From Saxon times, if mistletoe was hung over the door or above a hearth, it was a sacred oath that the host would not kill his guests, even if they were mortal enemies, and would defend them against attack for as long as they remained beneath the mistletoe. The mistletoe pledge was often used at times of great feasts, like the winter solstice, when fights could easily break out after heavy drinking."
> 
> Civil War went differently in this fic, so expect background changes like the Avengers mostly getting along, and Jarvis still being alive. Chapter one is full of plot and flirting, chapter two is full of smut. If you don’t enjoy the latter genre I recommend stopping reading at the end of the first chapter. If you have any questions about the dubcon content (or any other possible triggers), please feel welcome to post a question as a review. I'm happy to clarify things if you'd like more details before you begin reading.
> 
> Merry Christmas/Hanukkah Sameach/Joyous Yule/Happy Holidays to all my readers! :)

When Loki strode through the door of Tony Stark’s penthouse in the middle of Stark Enterprises’ lavish Christmas party and pointed a spear threateningly at the Vision, Thor was the only one who didn’t panic.

Loki was clad in his favorite black and green leather outfit and struck an imposing figure as he posed in the doorway with a ball of green fire hovering above the palm of his left hand, wielding a golden spear with his right. There weren’t many New Yorkers who didn’t recognize him on sight, and the civilians were all scrambling for the elevator and the fire exit before Loki had even said a single word.

Loki grinned toothily at the sight of people pushing each other over as they fled from the very sight of him. “Mortals! You shall surrender the one known as ‘Vision’ to me, or face my wrath, and that of my-”

He paused as Thor’s booming hearty laughter rang out around the penthouse. Thor pointed a finger straight at Loki as he laughed.

With teeth clenched in irritation, Loki asked, “And what, dear brother, is so amusing? Do these mortals truly mean so little to you that my threatening their lives is insignificant?”

“Crazier than a whole tree full of coconuts the both of you,” snarked Tony, as he strode with faux casualness behind the bar where he had an Iron Man suitcase pack ready to change into in case of emergencies. “You really need a red nose to complete the whole look, Reindeer Games. It’d be very festive.”

“You’ve been outsmarted brother!” Thor said in a loud jovial tone. “What a day to see the Trickster tricked! ‘Tis the Solstice! Friend Tony has caught you. Look up!”

Loki tilted his head as he glared suspiciously as his brother. He was clearly wary it might be an unsubtle trick, as he tried to keep an eye on the Avengers scrambling for their weapons while he glanced quickly upwards. Suspended in the doorway right above his head was a bundle of mistletoe. The glossy green leaves and white berries were unmistakable.

“Damn you, Thor, may you die coughing in bed!” cursed Loki. He pulled off his large-horned helmet and threw it angrily to the ground. It landed with a muffled thump on the soft carpet, and rolled to one side. “Mistletoe truce it is, then. So be it. You have until dawn.”

“What the hell?” asked Tony. He didn’t let his confusion stop him from activating his briefcase, however. He stood stock still as pieces of red and gold armor clanked into position on his body, only briefly shifting his feet so the boots could lock into place.

Steve paused and looked around. “Do we… have a truce?”

Natasha didn’t stop to reflect, she just continued herding party guests into the stairwell, not trusting Loki to leave the elevator untrapped. “Don’t know, don’t care,” she muttered to him quickly. “Thor’s buying us time at least. Let’s clear out the civilians and worry about it later once the floor’s secure and we aren’t so crowded with potential hostages.”

She kicked off her high heels, and then grabbed the hem of her long black evening dress and ripped upwards twice to make thigh slits, leaving her expensive dress looking very bedraggled, and a scattering of glossy black sequins littering the floor. “Easier to fight,” she said to Steve, in brief explanation, gesturing at the now-exposed thigh holsters with black-handled guns. “I honestly don’t know why I even bothered to dress up. Bruce didn’t even show up.”

“Well you look lovely,” Steve offered, in vague apology. He turned to grab a phone out of someone’s hand who was taking pictures of Natasha and pushed the party guest through the doorway. “This is _not_ a time to linger for photographs, sir. Move along.” Men these days just had _no manners_.

“Hey, that’s the latest Stark Tech – it’s a Butler 7! I can’t believe Captain America is stealing my phone!” the man objected.

“You’ll get it back later. _Move_ , sir.” Courtesy _did_ have its limits.

“Unless you want to add ‘I got kicked in the balls by the Black Widow’ to your list of complaints, you’ll do what he says,” Natasha added, with a steely glare. “We’ve got bigger problems to deal with than an idiot with a death wish.”

Over Tony’s in-suit speakers, a smooth British voice gave him a quiet situation update. “Sir, I am pleased to inform you that Vision, the Scarlet Witch, Falcon, and Dr. Foster have been evacuated safely as per Emergency Plan Beta. Ant-Man and Hawkeye are standing by, awaiting instructions.”

“Thanks Jarvis,” replied Tony quietly.

“Where precisely have those clean-handed whelps fled to, then?” Loki muttered in frustration, ruffling his hand through his long dark hair. Tony made a mental note that Loki’s keen ears had overheard Jarvis’ quiet update.

“I’m sure you’d like to know, but I doubt you’re capable of understanding the answer,” Tony said. “So, what’s this about a truce, Frosty the Snowman? I thought you just stopped by for some egg nog and a spot of mass murder for old time’s sake. Whatever you wanted with the Vision, you’re not going to get it, so you may as well just sit your skinny ass down and have a drink. If you want a fight though, just say the word and we’ll give you the beat-down you’re probably used to by now.”

“So much for a truce,” muttered Natasha, as Jarvis automatically closed and locked the stairwell door behind the last of the fleeing party guests. She moved around behind the bar to get a bit of cover, and a cleaner line of fire on Loki. It looked like they were going to need it, especially if Tony kept talking.

“I like him,” grinned Loki.

Thor nodded in a friendly fashion, saluting his brother with his crystal tumbler full of Tony’s strongest vodka and a few ice cubes. “He enjoys a good flyte from time to time.”

“Yup, I’m a regular flyboy playboy,” Tony said, incorrectly assuming that they were talking about his airborne capabilities, rather than his love of bantering insults.

“Tony Stark – Iron Man – is our host,” Thor said to his brother, setting Mjölnir down on the floor and picking up an abandoned platter of oysters as he settled down onto one of the cream leather sofas. “So, he’s the one you’ll need to seal the truce with.” He started slurping down oysters without a care in the world.

“Fine,” said Loki, with sigh. He lent his golden spear against a wall, then walked over to Tony. 

Tony watched Loki warily, but the guy didn’t do anything except move closer and stare at him in an oddly expectant manner. “We shake on it then? Is this really necessary, Thor? I mean, we outnumber him, and my penthouse could do with a makeover anyway.” There was him, Thor, Black Widow, Cap, Ant-Man, and Hawkeye. He couldn’t see the last two, which meant they were hiding somewhere and were ready to attack as soon as the mood turned sour, no doubt. That was enough of a group to take Loki, even without Bruce around to teach the snotty so-called god another salutary lesson about not underestimating ‘dull creatures’.

“You cannot break a mistletoe truce!” Thor said, sounding deeply shocked. “It is sacred! The serpent Nidhogg feeds on the corpses of oath-breakers! As the host you must even defend Loki against any who dare to attack him like you would for any guest, to the last breath in your body! Do not say you would consider for a moment being an _oath-breaker_ , Tony!”

Thor’s face screws up in shocked disgust at the very thought of Tony committing a crime against hospitality that, judging by his expression, ranked somewhere around treason or interfering with corpses.

_Hmm_ , _sounds like I really can’t count on Thor if we go for this,_ Tony worried.

“Fury says to accept the truce,” Natasha reported. Fury wasn’t at the party, but Tony figured Natasha must have an earpiece or something, or that she’d been covertly texting her boss updates.

Damn Sokovia Accords. Man thought he got to boss Tony around now he was on the Council. Well… he was kind of right.

“Fine, fine, let’s shake on it then,” Tony said, holding his hand out to Loki.

“You are not as well read as you thought yourself,” Loki said, ignoring his hand. “A mistletoe truce is sealed with a kiss.”

“Seriously?!” Tony looked around the room for guidance.

Natasha was smiling slightly. For her, that was as dramatic as someone else’s bellow of laughter. Steve looked shocked.

Thor just looked impatient. “Of course. Now, kiss,” he said.

“Oh, that is just so wrong. Alright, fine, let’s do this mistletoe kiss, I’ll just pretend I’m still in college,” Tony said resignedly. Well, if he had to kiss an enemy, he’d make damn sure it was as awkward for Loki as it was for him.

The faceplate of his helmet swished away with a quiet electronic click, and Tony stepped forward and wrapped one arm around Loki’s back, and rested his other hand on Loki’s cheek as he dipped him into a kiss.

Loki seemed startled at first, grabbing roughly at Tony as if to push him away, as if expecting an attack. But his hands relaxed to a gentle hold when Tony’s lips met his, kissing him deeply, tongue licking at Loki’s lips until he softened and began returning the kiss with increasing enthusiasm.

Tony kept the kiss going a while, while in the background Steve muttered, “Oh my god.”

Thor meanwhile seemed to be spluttering incoherently around a mouthful of oysters. Tony absent-mindedly wondered if Asgardian gods could choke to death.

Loki straightened up, and Tony let him, their mouths still locked together as Tony’s armored hand tangled in Loki’s hair. Then it was Tony’s turn to be dipped, as Loki turned the tables and bent Tony to one side, ravishing his mouth with another hungry kiss, hands kneading at the small of his back.

Tony had had plenty of partners, but it had been years since Tony had made out with a guy, and it was kind of exciting even though it _was_ Loki. He’d cut _way_ back on liaisons with men ever since he’d started being personally involved in bidding for military contracts for Stark Industries. Bunch of homophobic, bisexual-erasing bastards. He didn’t really care what they thought, but… he _did_ care about his thousands of employees who’d lose their livelihoods if Stark Industries floundered. It was for their sake that he’d cleaned up his public image – so to speak – to that of a heterosexual playboy.

Pepper had promised that he could date all the men or women he damn well wanted, so long as he realized the possible consequences on the company (and preferably, kept things discreet, or at least out of the tabloids). And, of course, so long as they weren’t Korean spies out to steal Stark tech. It had just been the _one_ time, dammit, and it’s not like she’d been a _professional_ spy, just a rival company employee. If Pepper had insisted Tony should only date women he probably would’ve dated male underwear models just to spite her, but she’d backed his freedom to choose one hundred percent, so he’d voluntarily chosen to keep his male bed partners to an occasional discreet professional, for the ongoing good of his stock prices and the company. The press hadn’t got wind of any of it for decades.

“Don’t you think that’s enough kissing now?” Steve asked, sounding uncomfortable.

Loki loosened his grip on Tony’s armored waist and back, and straightened up, planting one last peck on Tony’s lips as he let him go. “My, my,” purred Loki. “Who knew that the Man of Iron could be so unmanly?”

“Look who’s talking, Mrs. Svadilfari!”

Loki looked shocked. Thor, who’d recovered from his spluttering fit, looked flabbergasted for a moment and then started laughing.

Tony turned to Steve with a wink and loudly confided, “Didn’t you see? He was _so_ into it too. Loki’s got a tongue like an electric eel, and he likes the taste of a man’s tonsils.”

“I was _not_ watching,” Steve said, blushing furiously.

“Why not? Would Bucky get jealous?” Tony asked with a smirk.

“We are _not_ a couple!”

“You keep telling yourself that. I’m just saying, straight men don’t look their friend’s ass like that, Steve. I think Bucky’s into you, too. It’s not the forties any longer, it’s alright to date other men.”

“We’re just friends, and Bucky likes women.”

“For a straight man he’s suspiciously single and into you,” Tony finished, noticing how Steve wouldn’t meet his eyes. He was _so_ right.

“So, the truce is all official now?” Natasha asked.

“Until dawn,” Thor confirmed. “However, you seal a truce with a kiss on the brow or cheek, Tony!”

Tony glanced at Loki, who grinned a toothy smile before throwing his head back in delighted laughter.

“Oops? Well, no-one told me that. Do I need to kiss him again, then?”

“Maybe,” Loki laughed.

“No!” Thor said. “That was quite sufficient.”

“So, what’s with that Mrs. Svadilfarry reference?” Natasha asked, mangling the pronunciation slightly.

“Am I the only one who _ever_ does the readings?” Tony whined. “He was a horse, a stallion to be precise. Great tale, super embarrassing for the pretty green mare over there. Didn’t anybody else bother to research Norse mythology?”

“It was a tale greatly exaggerated on Midgard, to my detriment,” Loki said, still looking amused. “But I am pleased to hear you’ve been enjoying tales of my exploits. I enchanted a mare in heat to lure the builder’s stallion away, I didn’t transform into the mare myself. However, I _am_ a very skilled shapeshifter, so rumors _did_ spread. I blame Fandral for that.”

He did indeed look pleased rather than insulted, and his voice purred seductively as he spoke to Tony, leaning in closer than politeness usually allowed. Loki rapped on Tony’s armor with a metallic clang, and suggested, “You could take your armor off now. We won’t be _fighting_ today.”

“One kiss and he gets all pushy,” Tony complained. “Does he really think I’m that easy after one kiss?”

“I counted at least five kisses,” Natasha said, ambling out from behind the bar, guns still snug in their thigh holsters. She smiled as she handed Loki a cocktail, a brandy balloon full of a lightly fizzing amber concoction, which he took a little suspiciously, waving a hand over the glass goblet. It glittered briefly with a sparkle of magic, but the results of whatever spell he’d cast must have satisfied him, for he took a drink after that and settled down on the sofa set, picking out an armchair.

“A little weak,” Loki complained, after taking a sip, “and overly fruity. No honey mead?”

“They have mead, but it’s not much to boast of,” Thor said. “I recommend vodka, though the taste is bland.”

“It’s a cocktail, called a ‘Frosty Amour’,” Natasha said, with a flirtatious wink. “It has Southern Comfort, vodka, apricot brandy, and a couple of other liqueurs, topped with lemonade.” Loki grinned, at either her wink or the cocktail’s name.

“So, what have you been up to lately, Prince Loki?” Natasha asked, relaxing on the sofa near Loki and Thor, and stealing one of Thor’s oysters as she made not-so-casual small talk.

“Visiting my people,” Loki said stiffly, his mercurial good humor disappearing in the blink of an eye.

Tony moved across the room to a good location to let Jarvis remove his armor, since it didn’t seem to be needed, more’s the pity. Well, he was a bit too drunk to be truly fighting fit right now, so maybe it was for the best.

“None have seen you in Asgard since your last escape,” Thor said skeptically, blonde eyebrows arched up in disbelief.

Loki rolled his eyes. “Aren’t you always quick these days to point out I’m adopted? I meant my _other_ people. I have been seeking out my true kin in the Jotunn’s main fortress-city of Utgard.”

Thor looked grave. “Ah. The frost giants. Should I call you not Odinson then, but Loki Laufeyson?”

“Odin has long since ceased to deserve the title of ‘father’,” Loki spat. “Apparently, my birth name was Thokk. And my people prefer to be called Jotunns, actually.”

“Thokk Laufeyson?” Thor said slowly, sounding out the name thoughtfully. “I would have thought trying to destroy Jotunnheim would have put somewhat of a damper on your efforts to befriend the giants.”

Loki relaxed back into his chair, putting his feet up on the coffee table and taking another sip of his drink. “You can still call me Loki,” he said, with a casual shrug.

“Befriending Jotunns was an easier task than I imagined, actually. They’re a violent race, and respect someone with the will and power to destroy a world. It certainly helped that I come of good stock, of course.”

“A prince, the son of King Laufey.”

Loki shrugged. “Monarch Laufey might be a better translation. My sire was Farbauti. Laufey was more… my mother.”

“Who rules the Jotunns now?” Natasha asked.

“Skrymir,” Loki said. “An unusually tall fellow, even amongst the Jotunn.” He clearly thought the information wouldn’t be of much use to her. Tony knew she’d get a bonus point from Fury for relaying it, though; that man didn’t think there was any such thing as ‘too much information’.

“Farbautison? No! We saw Laufey! He didn’t have breasts! He had muscles!” Thor objected.

“He wasn’t pregnant or breastfeeding, so he hadn’t grown them at that time.”

Thor’s mouth screwed up in disgust. “Urgh.”

“Oh, grow up!” snapped Loki. “And don’t blame _me_ that the only education Asgardians get about frost giants is terrifying bedtime tales!”

“I wasn’t blaming you!”

“Why are you calling Laufey ‘he’ if Laufey was a woman?” Tony called out curiously, from behind the bar where he was mixing himself another drink since the bartenders had fled with the other civilians, and Natasha was just lounging around unhelpfully not serving _him_ a drink. It was totally unfair. “Which pronoun did she… or he… prefer? What’s up with all that? Was she cross-dressing?”

“All Jotunn prefer to be addressed with masculine pronouns by the other races, since there’s only one gender amongst their – our – kind, and to be presumed male is to garner greater status as warriors with many of the ‘halfling’ races,” Loki explained, seemingly perfectly willing to be derailed from another argument with his foster brother.

Tony shrugged. “Fair enough. ‘He’ it is then. That’s what you like too, right?”

“Obviously,” Loki said stiffly. “I was raised as an Asgardian, after all, and I very much think of myself as male. I am no woman.”

“And a very fine figure of a man you are,” Tony said, flirting almost automatically as his eyes roved up and down Loki’s body.

“He trains well enough,” agreed Thor. “Even without being a Jotunn, he could make you think he is a woman, though!”

Loki scowled at Thor, who hastily followed that statement with an apologetic explanation. “I mean… with magic. You can spin cunning illusions that would make everyone think he is someone else entirely!” Thor said. “Sif and Loki had quite the feud for a good twenty years, after she caught him impersonating her!”

“Did you really cut her hair off?” Tony asked curiously.

Loki smirked. “Yes, and she very much deserved it. For all that she claims to be a warrior and that she cares not for the opinions of others, she is still a very vain woman. It was a fine revenge.”

“So, where are your allies who were going to attack us this evening?” Natasha asked. “Should we expect more guests?”

“Not up to your usual standards of subtlety, Black Widow,” Loki chided.

She smiled in what looked like genuine amusement, casual and relaxed, dimples appearing in her cheeks. “We’re all friends here this evening, and there’s no harm in asking, surely? There’s really no subtle way to work a question like that into a conversation.”

“They’re around,” Loki said, smiling and waving a hand in vague circles in the air unhelpfully.

“Maybe I’ll even tell you where they are, if you are all pleasant enough company. I might consider trading that information for another kiss, perhaps?” he said, with a wink and a grin of delighted wickedness.

Natasha purred, “You have a deal.” She rose and stalked over to him, hips swaying seductively as she walked.

“Oh, come on,” Steve whined.

“Think of it like that wartime truce in the trenches, where the Germans and the Brits sang Christmas songs together and had a game of soccer,” suggested Tony, giving his friend a comforting pat on the arm. “Except with more kissing.”

“But she likes Bruce!” Steve hissed in his ear. “He’ll come back eventually!”

“She’s a professional spy. This is part of the job,” Tony murmured. “She’ll be fine. Bruce will either understand or he won’t.”

Loki leaned forward in his chair and tilted his head up in welcome as Natasha bent down towards him, cleavage on carefully strategic display.

“I didn’t say a kiss with _you_ ,” Loki said, breathing the words against her lips as she hovered above him, her hands on the arms of his sofa chair. “I want another kiss from Tony Stark.”

Natasha smiled, an inch away from his lips, and straightened up. She went back to her previous spot on the sofa and curled up this time with her feet tucked up. “Well, far be it for me to stand in the way of true love. Or temporary lust.”

“Why do all the weird ones get obsessed with you, Tony?” Steve asked, dragging a tired hand down his face. “This is like Madame Masque all over again.”

“Everyone loves me. I’m every woman’s man, and every man’s woman,” Tony said proudly, running a hand down the lapels of his shirt, vainly attempting to smooth out some wrinkles the Iron Man suit had left behind. “Except for your murder snow bunny – he’s not so keen on me. You can keep him. Popsicle and icicle, you’ll make a great couple once you both get your vintage heads around the idea.”

“Go on, Tony,” Natasha said, with an encouraging wave in Loki’s direction. “For the good of the world.”

“ _You_ told me we shouldn’t get involved with mortals,” Thor objected, frowning accusingly at Loki. “ _You_ said they live too briefly.”

“I’m not getting _attached_ like you are,” Loki rebutted. “He’d be a handsome man to tumble, that’s all.”

“Whoa there, Leather Lad, you’ve only got the okay for a kiss, let’s not get ahead of ourselves, there!”

“What if I took on a female form?” Loki asked, with a tilt of his head and a seductive look. In the flash of an eye there were _two_ Black Widows, but only one of them was smiling flirtatiously at Tony. The other one – the original – looked very irritated, to Tony’s expert eye. Most people would still just see a smiling pretty woman and wouldn’t spot the tiny tell of anger in the slight thinning of her lips.

Asking Loki to stop for her sake would probably just make it worse… but there were other ways to get the desired result and put her at ease so she wouldn’t stab himself ‘accidentally’ in training later. “Can you do Bucky?” Tony asked Loki mischievously.

“What?” choked Steve.

“Of course,” Loki said, in Black Widow’s sultry contralto voice. He uncrossed his legs and his appearance shifted to Bucky’s, with straggly long brown hair, a stubbled face, and his trademark silver arm. It was officially trademarked now; Stark Industries’ lawyers had seen to that. Agent Coulson had been collecting all the new Avengers action figures. He thought none of them knew.

“You can’t… with him looking like that! It’s just…” Steve trailed off.

“It’s not really him, it’s still Loki underneath,” Tony said with a smile, tossing back the rest of his scotch and walking away from Steve and the bar towards Loki. “And it’s not like you’re dating Bucky or attracted to him, right? So, there shouldn’t be a problem with it.”

“You don’t even _like_ Bucky!” Steve spluttered. “You don’t, right? Do you actually uh…?”

Tony perched on the soft arm of Loki’s sofa chair, and the Bucky-lookalike wrapped his metallic arm around Tony’s waist, and leaned his head of shaggy brown hair gently against Tony’s side. Like Tony, Loki was busy watching Steve’s reaction with a look of gleeful expectation.

“I don’t have to _like_ someone to think they’re hot,” Tony teased. “Your murder bunny has that cute dishevelled stubbled look really working for him, don’t you think?”

“You’re just making fun of me – stop it!” Steve said, trying for a stern rebuke despite his embarrassment. “You and Bucky fight enough without _this_ to make things worse.”

“I’ll stop teasing only if you promise to ask Bucky out on a date,” Tony replied.

“Fine! I’ll ask him out, are you happy now?” Steve grumbled, red as a beetroot.

“Not so straight as a ruler as you like to claim, are you?” Tony said gleefully. “Welcome to the wonderful world of bisexuality, brother! Your complimentary toaster is in the mail.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about with the toaster, but I’m actually ah… gay,” Steve said, puffing his chest out in determined pride.

“That’s the spirit! Blow that cupboard door wide open! Stars and Spangles, now with added glitter!”

“There goes the team. All the good ones are gay,” sighed Natasha sadly, then paused for a moment. “Oh, Scott insists that everyone should know that in fact he’s most definitely heterosexual. Clint says he is straight too, but taken, and sends his congratulations to Steve for ‘finally admitting the obvious.’“

“I’m bisexual, remember?” Tony corrected. “Not gay. I’m equal-opportunity sexy, for the right person.” He absent-mindedly played with Loki’s hair, until he spotted Steve’s wince. He glanced down, to see Loki still impersonating Bucky.

“You know, you can change back to your real form now, if you want that bonus kiss. You _are_ naturally sexier than Bucky, ruggedly scruffy though he is.”

“My natural form?” Loki said, a glint in his eye.

The illusion of Bucky melted away with a golden shimmer, and Loki’s dark-haired form was revealed briefly, before his skin started tinging blue. Before Tony’s fascinated gaze, Loki’s skin turned a deep sky-blue, swirling runes appeared on his skin, and his eyes flushed from a mischievous blue-green to a ruby red.

“I still can’t believe it,” Thor muttered. The shake of his head and the way he had trouble looking at Loki practically screamed his discomfort. “Are you sure it’s not another illusion?”

“It is _not_ ,” Loki replied.

“That’s so cool! But you’re not very big. Or did frost _giants_ get their name in the bedroom?” Tony babbled. “Hey, if I lick you will my tongue stick to your skin? How cold are you?”

“Those are the first things you thought to ask?” Natasha asked with a wry smile. “How well endowed he is in this form, and can you _lick_ him safely?”

“It was just a thought…”

“The amount of scotch you’ve consumed this evening has clearly taken its toll.”

“Pfft. I can hold my liquor. I’m just naturally inclined to make inappropriate comments,” Tony said defensively.

“That’s true,” Natasha conceded thoughtfully.

“…It’s the climate. Frost giants slowly shrink in warm weather, and only slowly regain their size in icy surroundings,” Loki said slowly, “and I have lived for centuries in a temperate climate.”

“What if we put you in a blast chiller? Jarvis, do we have a blast chiller?”

A dry British voice answered over a hidden speaker, “Yes, sir. In the kitchens on the first basement level. The relatively low humidity level would not be conducive to the growth of additional ice, however, if that is what Mr. Laufeyson requires.”

“I’m sure I could tweak that, though. What about liquid nitrogen? Hey, Loki, have you tried pouring liquid nitrogen on your skin? What would that do to you? What is your temperature tolerance range in this form? Will you get stronger in colder temperatures? What does cold weather do to your magical abilities – does it enhance them?”

Loki stared at him, ruby eyes blinking slowly.

“Hello?” Tony said, waving a hand in front of Loki’s face. “Do you think slower in this form? I could build you a cooling helmet for your head?”

“Stop that!” Loki said, batting Tony’s hand away with his forearm. “Why are you babbling questions at me? Do you not fear me?”

“Welll… yes, a bit. But you know, not more than I did before,” Tony said honestly. “But your spear is _way_ over there against the wall, and Thor’s super sure you’ll hold to the truce. So, you know. You’re safe enough right now. I’ve gone to _heaps_ of politely boring business meetings with people who want me dead, this isn’t a lot different. Except for the kissing. Did you still want that bonus kiss for info?”

Tony puckered up and made kissing smacks of his lips in the air, then grinned at Loki. “Offer’s still on the table. I’m game, and not so drunk I can’t properly consent.”

“Why is he not terrified? I see fear in the others’ eyes, though they try to hide it,” Loki demanded, turning to Thor for answers.

“I’m not frightened of you,” Steve insisted.

“Yes, you are,” Loki said, waving a hand dismissively. “More so in this form than before.”

“Midgardians are a mixed lot. These are the bravest heroes among their kind. Those who fear you will still stand ready to fight you if there is need, and others,” Thor said, glancing at Tony who was gazing with fascination at the swirling designs on Loki’s hands, “are truly fearless. You were incapacitated at the time and perhaps did not hear the Midgardian bards’ tales, but Iron Man flew fearlessly into the portal to the Chitauri that you opened. He carried a city-killing explosive through to destroy their mother-ship, even though he believed he would perish in the attempt.”

“Valhalla for you when your time comes at last,” Loki said to Tony, respect in his voice. “A brave man indeed.”

“Plus, you’re pretty. Nothing to be scared of,” Tony added. He didn’t want _too_ much credit. “You’re a sexy Papa Smurf. Who was the sexiest Smurf again?”

Tony tried to absent-mindedly remember the old cartoons from decades ago. Was it Hefty Smurf? Did they all have adjective-names like Snow White’s dwarves? He’d liked Brainy the best. Poor Brainy was so unappreciated and picked on, and he tried so _hard_ to impress and please people.

“I am a _frost giant_ you stupid mortal! I am the creature of nightmares you scare children with, and leaders vow to obliterate!” Loki’s ruby eyes were bright as he leaned forwards to glare at Tony as he spoke. Tony wasn’t impressed.

“I’m sorry for that, brother-”

“You’re not the bogeyman on earth,” Tony interrupted, speaking over the top of Thor’s apology that Loki was sneering at. “Hardly anyone’s even heard of the Jotunn, and even fewer believe they’re real. And I _don’t care_ about that anyway, I care that you tried to _waste New York_ , Magic Smurf. Though fair’s fair, the bloody Council pissed me off just as much. Your army killed hundreds. Our own damn people tried to kill _millions_ , and Bruce and I’ve had to quickly invent some new decontamination medical tech to help me recover from bone marrow syndrome and other nasty stuff from the radiation poisoning. You’re just a baby villain compared to the homegrown variety. Hell, even _I’ve_ killed more people than you.”

“What?!” Natasha asked in shock.

“I’m the ‘Merchant of Death’, remember?” Tony said, with a self-deprecating shrug.

“Not that,” she said, rolling her eyes. “The _radiation poisoning_.”

_Oops._ He’d been keeping that bit of information secret and had been doing so well until now. Secrets were harder to keep to yourself when you were tipsy.

“I watched a nuclear bomb explode while uncomfortably close to the hypocenter – ground zero. That’s… not a good thing, Nat. If you can see the blinding flash of the mushroom cloud, you’re almost certainly _way_ too close to it. I escaped flash blindness and retinal burns thanks to my armor design favoring a HUD over allowing actual vision. I’m seriously lucky to be alive – with thanks to my suit – but was touch and go there for a while. Bruce got to be jolly and green thanks to the wonders of gamma radiation, but all I got was diarrhea and bleeding out my ass, and an almost certain likelihood I’ll have to adopt thanks to non-functional swimmers.”

_Peter is a good kid_ , Tony mused to himself, not for the first time. _Much less work than raising a baby, too. It could work._ _Boy loves his aunt, though… I don’t want to mess with that._

“I had no idea, but I should have realized it might be a risk. Like at Hiroshima, right?” Steve checked. “The radiation sickness? I read about that.”

“Yup, much like that, except the bombs we have now are even more powerful than the one we dropped on Hiroshima. Don’t worry, something else will probably kill me long before the leukemia kicks in. Stem cell transfusions and some ground-breaking bone marrow experiments have got me pretty much back to normal, so fingers crossed I don’t even get it. If all else fails, Bruce has got some exciting but terrifying back-up plans in mind. Science Bro won’t let me down.” Tony didn’t like the idea of a gamma-irradiated blood transfusion, but the healing factor the Hulk had would take care of most diseases and degenerative conditions and _especially_ any radiation poisoning issues, should worst come to worst.

Tony was still perched on the arm of Loki’s chair, and glanced his way. They probably shouldn’t be chatting about this in front of someone who’d be their enemy again tomorrow. Loki had shifted back to his usual Aesir form and looked dark-haired and broody. Not much of a change from Bucky, really. Except he had one extra natural arm and was more inclined to smile than the Winter Brooder.

“No more Magic Smurf?” Tony asked disappointedly. “But I wanted to put you in a blast chiller!”

Loki gave him a wondering look.

“Ethically dubious experiments _later_ ,” Natasha said, with another dimpled smile. “Exchange of sexual favors for information _now_.”

She looked all charming and friendly, but Tony knew she was ready to shoot Loki in the head if things went bad and she thought she had a clean shot. She was dependable like that.

“Oh, all right,” Tony said with a sigh. “I guess that’s fun, too, even if I won’t find out if my tongue would stick.”

Tony slid deliberately off the arm of the sofa and into Loki’s lap. It was a little more difficult to catch his balance again than he expected – damn scotch – and Loki caught him around the waist.

“I’ve been a _very_ good boy this year, Frosty Santa, and for Christmas this year I would like to know what your minions are up to right now,” Tony purred, holding his hands together pleadingly as he gazed into Loki’s bright, amused eyes.

“Have you now, my soft cat?” Loki asked, stroking Tony’s hair and giving him a gentle kiss on the lips.

“Oh, that’s just _wrong_ ,” Steve said, closing his eyes with a wince.

Natasha shrugged. “It’s just sex.”

“If it’s getting any worse I’m out of here,” Steve insisted. “This is such a bad idea.”

Thor sighed. “Brother, do you have to do this sort of thing every time I make new friends? It’s embarrassing. Can’t you find someone else to play with?”

“I feel like I’m a new toy and you’re fighting over me.”

“It isn’t a bad comparison,” Thor admitted, with a touch of embarrassment. “He always gets jealous of my friends, instead of finding friends of his own.”

“You’re the crown prince! Everyone wants to be your friend or is willing to act like they do!” hissed Loki, tightening his grip around Tony’s waist. “They lie, and they use you, and you don’t even _notice_. Well, I want to befriend this one. You have more than you need, anyway.”

“Could we _please_ focus on what Loki’s allies are up to right now?” Natasha said, then looked visibly pained as her interjection was ignored. She sighed in a resigned fashion.

“Some might say trying to invade earth and oh, trying to kill me, put a bit of a damper on that chance?” Tony suggested, bemused to find himself in the middle of a social tug-of-war.

“Come now, if I had truly been trying to kill you, you would be dead,” Loki said, with a shrug. “Let the past go.”

“You tried to conquer the world,” Steve said, a hint of anger in his voice for the first time. “Should we let that go too?”

“He didn’t try very hard,” Tony said, stretching out a hand to pat Loki’s cheek. “Did you, Rudolph?”

“Didn’t try very hard-!” Steve spluttered. “Hundreds of people _died_ , Tony!”

“Yes, and I’m still mad as hell about that, but it was still the lamest invasion ever. A bottlenecked invasion of a first world nation focused on a civilian target – not government or military – with plenty of warning hints and a nice sky beam saying, ‘attack me here’ originating right from my own tower?” Tony shook his head ruefully. “I was busy and distracted at the time, but it was easy enough to figure out later. I’ve heard Thor’s stories and read between the lines, and Loki isn’t an idiot. He _wanted_ to lose.”

“No!” Thor objected. “We beat him in fair battle!”

Tony glanced at Loki to find him staring at him with intense fascination, his eyes burning bright and locked onto Tony’s face like there was nothing else in the room worthy of his interest. “Do you not glory in your victory? Do you think you have everything worked out, you cunning smith? Do you think that it was just another of Loki Silvertongue’s lies?”

“I’m certainly glad to have helped save New York, but it’s not much of a victory when someone throws the match, and you did that at least twice that I know of. I’m certain I figured out a lot, but not all of it. What I don’t understand is _why_ ,” Tony asked. “Not that we wouldn’t all _want_ to take over the world, but most of us squash that impulse _way_ down.”

“I had my reasons. Maybe I will even explain them one day,” Loki said. He smiled, but Tony thought his eyes looked haunted. Maybe it was more daddy issues. From what Thor had told him, the man had a bucket-load of them.

“We don’t _all_ have that impulse, Tony,” Steve corrected.

“We don’t? How about you, Natasha?”

“Maybe a little bit of meaningless daydreaming. Mostly in regard to Russia,” she admitted, with a wink. “I’d make a good Tsarina.”

“Did Ultron get that yearning from _you_ , Tony?” Steve fretted.

“We agreed to never use the U-word again, Steve,” Tony said firmly. “That topic is forbidden, and strictly limited to boring meetings. He’s deader than disco. You don’t talk about U-Know-Who, and Bruce and I don’t point fingers and explain to you again why Sabrina the Teenage Witch shouldn’t have been pushed onto the team, and we’re all happier like that.”

In the end, Steve’s righteous arguments for her inclusion (centered around second chances) hadn’t weighed as heavily on Tony’s consideration as Vision’s shy pleas had. Tony’s son (in mind if not in body) had a crush on the little witch, and Tony wasn’t going to ruin his chance for happiness.

If Ultron had been a little smarter he would’ve just created a cute little robot body and used puppy eyes and a pleading voice on Tony. He could’ve talked about how _happy_ he would be to conquer just a _little_ bit of the world for its own good. Then maybe Tony and Jarvis would’ve made a secretive short list of countries with tyrannical governments rife with human rights abuses that could maybe use a new ruler who would look after the populace better. Tony loved his artificial children; he still even held a tiny shred of pride for Ultron, though he wouldn’t admit that out loud to anyone. He had boundary issues about saying no to them. Jarvis had been so _curious_ about SHIELD’s databases, and he hadn’t the heart to say no when Jarvis’ smooth British tones had politely asked him to plant a device on the Helicarrier to let him hack into them. His baby was all grown up and wanting to hack secret agencies’ networks for Tony’s sake, and Tony couldn’t be prouder.

Loki was tracing designs over the back of Tony’s shirt and listening to their rambling conversation when it was interrupted by the noise of an explosion outside. It was faint enough that it obviously hadn’t originated from inside Stark Tower itself, but Tony knew that for it to be heard up at the penthouse it must be pretty impressively loud and destructive down at ground level.

“That… didn’t sound good,” Steve worried. “Jarvis?”

Jarvis’ smooth British tones updated them immediately. “A team of super-powered individuals calling themselves the ‘Wrecking Crew’ are destroying Grand Central Terminal. Vanderbilt Hall is in increasing danger of imminent collapse, and a large number of commuters and civilians at the Holiday Fair are endangered.”

“Brother! For shame!” Thor said.

“Not your brother,” Loki muttered, then his mouth quirked up in a smile. “In reward for your earlier kiss, Stark, you might like to know that those causing havoc at Grand Central Terminal are my associates.”

“Foster-brother, then,” said Thor.

“Does this count as breaking the truce, Thor?” Tony asked.

“No. The mistletoe truce ends when he or you depart your home, or at dawn. He did not order them to attack while he was here. Nor for that matter did you set a time when he had to share the information bargained for a kiss, or press for an immediate answer.”

“Sneaky,” Tony said.

“Thank you,” Loki said, taking it as a compliment and saluting him with a drink. “It was _supposed_ to be a mid-battle distraction to split your forces.”

Tony rolled his eyes upwards and stroked his trim dark goatee in a thoughtful fashion. “Yeah, that would have worked a treat. Still will, actually.”

Steve cleared his throat. “Alright, let’s go team! Tony’s safe enough watching Loki and keeping him busy and tied up here – gosh, that came out wrong – and we’re needed out there.” Steve finished his sentence with a wince.

“Black Widow, you stay too – collapsing buildings aren’t your thing and I want someone with Iron-Man just in case; call if you need us back. Thor, you’re with me-”

Natasha raised her hand and interrupted, “Clint begs to be invited so he doesn’t have to hang around and watch Loki and Tony make out.”

“Sure,” Steve agreed. “Hawkeye and Ant-Man, you’re coming too. Jarvis, please call Falcon and get him to meet us there. Vision and the Scarlet Witch stay together in hiding with Jane.”

“And that would be where, exactly?” Loki asked.

“Somewhere secret you’ll never discover!” Thor said proudly.

“Did you _honestly_ think that would work?” Tony asked Loki, genuinely curious.

Loki patted Tony’s cheek indulgently, just like Tony had done to him earlier. “It has in the past. He's a slow learner.”

Hawkeye emerged from a ceiling vent with only the softest squeak of complaining metal – somewhat to Tony’s surprise as he would’ve sworn no-one could fit in those narrow ducts – and jogged off to join Steve who was heading for the lifts. Loki and Hawkeye carefully ignored each other, which was probably all for the best, given they had a truce.

“Farewell brother!” Thor boomed, as he picked up Mjölnir and strode to the balcony. “Iron-Man, remember that the truce ends at dawn – do not get caught out!”

“I know!” Tony said, a little irritated.

“I’ll remember,” reassured Natasha. “Good luck!”

Thor nodded, and flung his hammer-arm outwards, launching himself into the sky dragged along behind his enchanted hammer, heading down Park Avenue towards the distant wails of emergency vehicles.

“Maybe _now_ you’ll be a little more focused on me and less on your friends,” Loki said, licking his bottom lip and leering at Tony. He tugged at Tony’s shirt, staring to jerk it free from his pants.

“Consent is just another word to you, isn’t it?”

“Oh, I won’t do anything you truly don’t want me to,” Loki said, with a leer. “Ideally, I’d like you to _beg_ me, in fact.” His fingertips started sliding up under the shirt and over Tony’s bare skin, and when he began tracing over some of the far-too-many scars on Tony’s back instead of withdrawing in shock or distaste, Tony didn’t have the will to stop him. It had been too long since anyone touched him like that who didn’t need to be both paid and briefed in advance to not worry over the rough raised lines of scars resulting from his weeks in Afghanistan where he had been insufficiently cooperative for his captors’ tastes.

With his ass nestled snugly into Loki’s lap, Tony could feel a stirring hardness – even through the thick leather – that indicated just how much Loki enjoyed what he was doing, or the thought of Tony begging him for sexual favors. Tony didn’t want to admit it out loud, but he kind of didn’t mind that plan either. With the number of ex-partners who’d made small fortunes selling their stories to _The National Enquirer_ and that ilk, he’d learnt even in his teens that it was best to be as vanilla as possible to reduce the temptation for his exes to gossip.

Tony glanced over a little uncomfortably at Natasha, who gave him a nod and an encouraging look and said, “Don’t mind me, honeypot. Pretend I’m not even here. You two have a nice chat.” She wandered away to another set of seats further away from them and sat down on a sofa with her legs tucked up under her again, and started tapping away on her phone, pointedly ignoring them.

She’d dropped in “honeypot” very casually, like it was a meaningless cute nickname, and Loki didn’t react to the slang term. However, Tony made a note of it. For a moment he wondered why she was talking about isolated computer systems used to lure in cyberattacks, before he ‘got that reference’ (that Loki probably missed) and remembered it was also spy lingo for sexual seduction for the purposes of gaining information or luring someone to join your side. The Black Widow’s theoretically secure SHIELD file said she’d been trained as a ‘swallow’ by the KGB – a female agent who used her looks as just another weapon in her arsenal. She wouldn’t judge anything Tony did with Loki. Tony wondered if that was why Steve had left her here with him. He knew she didn’t talk much with all-too-shiny Steve about her past. But Bucky, well, she’d bonded with him, and helped him come to terms with his dark past. Bucky might’ve told Steve about some of it.

Tony thought convincing Loki to fall into his bed and spill all his secrets might be easier said than done, though.

“Will you join me in bed?” Loki asked, pressing a kiss to Tony’s neck while Tony looked off distractedly into the distance.

Tony spluttered. _Well, at least half of this mission would be easy._

“Don’t you think you should ask before kissing me?”

“You’ve been sitting in my lap for half an hour without complaint. I took that as an encouraging sign. Do you want me to stop?”

“…No.”

“You could beg me _not_ to stop,” Loki purred.

“I’m not the begging kind.” Well, not usually until things _really_ got going.

Loki laughed. “I like a challenge. Let us start by you asking me politely to resume kissing you.”

Tony huffed. “I suppose you could do it again. If you wanted to. You still killed a lot of people though,” he grumbled.

“So have you.”

“Not on purpose! Not directly,” Tony said defensively.

“Neither have I,” Loki said, kissing Tony’s neck again.

Loki traced a line of kisses over Tony’s neck, planting feather-light kisses on his collarbone, and inching up his neck to his ear. Tony felt his arousal grow and hoped desperately that Natasha wasn’t watching them too closely. Mind you, it wouldn’t be the first time Tony had made out with an ill-chosen partner in public at the end of a party.

“Care… to explain that a bit more?” Tony asked breathlessly, as Loki sucked on his earlobe and ran his hands over Tony’s back. Tony moaned involuntarily when Loki’s tongue pushed into his ear wetly. Loki’s roaming hands moved around to his chest, tracing curiously over the puckered circle of scarred skin where Tony’s arc reactor had once been.

“Care to come to my bed?” Loki countered. His breath tickled as he spoke softly right into Tony’s ear. It made him shiver, and he leaned back against Loki’s chest, neck arching involuntarily as Loki resumed nibbling gently on his ear.

“You could explain this change,” Loki said, as his thin smooth fingers continued to trace over the scar on Tony’s chest, rubbing over the too-smooth skin in the center, and tracing the rough edges. If not for Extremis biotech, Tony wouldn’t be functioning and looking as good as he did, but it was still scar tissue and hadn’t healed as good as new. He still had feeling there, though, and he felt a quiet thrill that someone was intrigued – and perhaps aroused – by a part of his body that was unattractive to most.

“You could call off your flunkies at Grand Central?” Tony suggested.

“For what price? How about a night in your bed?”

“Sure, yes. Done.”

Loki’s hands and mouth stilled, and Loki pulled back from him, shifting Tony around in his lap a little so he could look at him better.

“Truly? You would give your word and fall into my arms so easily for such a small thing?”

“People’s lives aren’t small,” Tony snapped. “Yes, I give my word – a night in my bed.”

“Alone with just the two of us,” Loki added suspiciously, his eyes narrow. “With you naked in my arms for an evening of romance. Uninterrupted by any of your friends or associates. No harm to either of us. Tonight.”

“Jarvis will monitor us like he does with all my bed partners, and interrupt only in situations like the unlikely case of a truly important message or a genuine emergency that no-one else can handle,” Tony promised. “Yes to everything else, and you have to leave peacefully just before dawn.”

“I suppose that is acceptable, and no worse than Heimdall’s constant lecherous peeping gaze.”

“Does he really have a thousand eyes?” Tony asked.

“Just two. But they are… odd. Well, we have a deal. To bed then!” Loki brightened at the thought and picked Tony off his lap with surprising strength and set him down to stand on the floor. Asgardians were crazy strong. Or… frost giants were. Either way, moving Tony around with easy grace wasn’t proving much of a challenge. It was kind of hot, not that Tony really wanted to admit that.

“Call off your flunkies first.”

Loki’s lips quirked up in amusement, and with a negligent wave of his hand an identical duplicate of himself appeared, then bowed and disappeared from sight in a green shimmer of light.

“That will do it?” Tony checked, as Loki rose from his seat too.

“It will. No doubt your red assassin will confirm it for you soon. In the meantime, kiss me.” Loki pulled Tony firmly against him, and Tony thought it both sensible and fun to go along with that plan.

Tony was pressed tightly against Loki’s body, and groaned as Loki kissed him firmly, tongue pushing demandingly into his mouth. Tony’s hands moved cautiously to Loki’s waist, skimming over the leather armor. There wasn’t really much to feel, with so many layers.

“How do you get your armor off?”

“Is that an invitation?”

“Not yet, just curious,” Tony said, glancing at Natasha who was pointedly ignoring them and playing with her phone. Probably exchanging information updates with Fury or someone else.

“Magic, usually, but there are buckles at the back, underneath my coat. How many suits of your remarkable armor do you own?”

“Quite a few, actually. I enjoy building variants for different situations and making upgrades.”

“Such as?”

Tony glanced over at Natasha. He really wasn’t sure how much information you should give to the not-quite-enemy about your own capabilities, when being a honeypot. “Nat?”

She looked up at his inquiring face. “Tell him about the one you built with Bruce. He’ll think it’s funny.”

Tony nodded thoughtfully. The Hulkbuster armor was slow and clunky, not something it’d be wise to fight Loki in. Low risk information. And if Natasha was suggesting he share the information, she was probably right. It might help build a rapport.

“What will amuse me, smith?”

“The Hulkbuster armor. Bruce and I designed it. It’s got a trade-off of maneuverability for durability and power, and a number of features designed to be particularly effective when fighting the Hulk.”

Loki blinked. “You expect betrayal, and plan for it? With the troll’s own cooperation?”

“Hulk, not troll. And not betrayal as such, but the Hulk isn’t always rational, and you never know. Bruce thought it was a great idea. We’re good buds, but realistic about things.”

“Lovers?” Loki whispered in Tony’s ear, then pressed another gentle kiss on Tony’s neck. He shivered.

“No. He’s straight, and not my type anyway. Too shy and awkward. A good friend, but not someone I’d want to take to bed.”

“And who is your type?”

“Someone confident,” Tony said, and pressed a kiss of his own on Loki’s lips. “They know what they want and aren’t afraid to say it. They respect my wishes in bed, and they don’t gossip about our time together afterwards.”

“I can be that for you.”

Natasha spoke up, “We have confirmation. The Wrecking Crew has peacefully departed Grand Central, having teleported away with the use of a magical artifact after being instructed to do so by Loki’s double. The team is remaining to assist with evacuation and repairs.”

Loki looked at Tony, and his gaze was heated. “Well, then.”

Tony cleared his throat. “Uh, yes. Thanks, I guess. My uh, bedroom is another level up.”

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” Natasha murmured. Tony honestly wasn't sure what that covered.

The short ride up to the top floor in the elevator was both awkward and arousing. Loki’s hands didn’t stop moving over Tony’s skin, sliding under his shirt and tracing the lines on his back, and the circular scar on his chest.

“Don’t share the footage with SHIELD, Jarvis,” Tony warned.

“Of course not, sir. Nor shall it be accessed by anyone else.”

“You’ve checked for any bugs?”

“Naturally, sir,” Jarvis said, sounding a little miffed. “Your security is my primary concern, and your privacy is assured.”

“Standard evening protocol, except do alert Black Widow and the others if there is a serious issue,” Tony said, then gasped as Loki bit gently at his neck.

“Do you _ever_ stop talking?” Loki asked.

“Not really. I talk in bed, too. I’m pretty vocal. How about you?”

“I suppose you shall find out soon enough,” Loki purred. His hands drifted down to caress Tony’s ass, kneading the muscle through his suit. “My partners usually prefer me to be quiet.”

“Well I prefer my partners to talk to me, and I love to make them scream in the good way,” Tony replied, leaning his head forward to kiss and nip at Loki’s neck. His tongue traced the skin along the neckline of the leather armor. “If you want to stay quiet I’ll cope, but I’d rather you didn’t.”

-000-

Once they were tucked up together naked in bed, Tony got cold feet. He vacillated between the attraction of a forbidden romance, and painful memories of fighting the man who was now looking at him with such hunger, hands roaming over his skin.

When Loki’s hands coasted over his sharp hipbones and reached for his cock, Tony pulled away. “I never promised to have sex with you.”

“You swore you would lie naked in my arms! An evening of romance!”

“And I will, but sex doesn’t have to be a part of that. I’m perfectly happy just lying here and cuddling and kissing your handsome self. It’s not my fault you weren’t specific enough and left a loophole.”

“Well played, smith. But if you will not make this evening pleasant for me, I see no reason why you should have any pleasure in it either,” Loki said, his admiration turning to a disappointed hiss.

Loki’s eyes shifted to ruby as his skin began to flush a pale blue, deepening to a richer shade. Swirls and lines began appearing on his skin. He turned his back to Tony, lying on his side facing away from him.

Tony looked at the broad expanse of blue skin before him and muzzily wondered exactly how cold it would be to touch. He nuzzled in closer.

Loki startled and looked back over his shoulder. “Did you just lick me?”

“…No?” Tony lied weakly. At least he knew now. His tongue _wouldn’t_ stick.

“…Do you want to do it some more?”

Tony rather thought he would, actually.


	2. The Pleasures of a Good Host

“Why don’t I get frostburn?” Tony asked curiously, licking Loki’s back again. He traced a swirl with his tongue, and Loki hissed in pleasure but didn’t move a muscle, as if perhaps worried about scaring Tony off. “Thor said a frost giant’s skin was so cold it’d damage you to touch it.”

“And yet you licked me?”

Tony thought about that for a moment. “Well, you weren’t radiating cold, and we were fine cuddling. So… I was pretty sure it’d be safe.”

Tony wiggled closer until he was spooning Loki from behind, wrapping his arms around the other man’s chest. Though he pondered that perhaps ‘man’ wasn’t the right word right this minute. Still, Loki preferred male pronouns, so Tony could work with that. He wasn’t going to misgender him. He wrapped an arm around Loki’s chest and toyed with the man’s dark blue nipples. No breasts - just pectoral muscles on a smooth blue hairless chest, he noted, peeking over Loki’s shoulder. He toyed with a nipple until it stiffened under his fingers.

“You are a fool,” Loki said, sounding strained. “A most perplexing and contradictory one.”

“It was a calculated risk,” Tony said defensively. “So, you can’t freeze people who touch you?”

“I could. If I wished to. Deeply cold skin is a battle defense, and under one’s conscious control with a little practice. Otherwise, how could there be half-breeds?”

Loki lay still as Tony nibbled and licked at his neck, his pink tongue lapping at the dark blue skin. It seemed tougher than human skin - more resilient. His teeth didn’t leave any indents behind after a few relatively gentle bites. Tony felt himself hardening, and his erect cock nudged against Loki’s ass. Loki didn’t seem to mind at all. With Loki looking so different, it didn’t remind him so much of the angry god who’d thrown him out his own window and tried to attack him and the other Avengers so many times since.

“Are there many?” Tony asked. “Hybrids?”

Loki snorted. “More than you might think. Including Odin, son of Borr and the frost giant Bestla. Half Jotunn, half Asgardian, all _bastard hypocrite_ ,” he hissed angrily.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you. Do you want to be distracted with some amazing sex?”

“I thought ‘cuddling’ was all you were prepared to concede to,” Loki said, distracted from his temper. He twisted around slightly in Tony’s arms to look him in the eye.

“I changed my mind. It happens. You look… intriguing like this. Different. Eighty percent less terrifying.”

“ _Less_ terrifying? I’m a frost giant!”

“Yes, but I’ve never fought you looking like this. So, there’s not so many bad memories.”

Loki nodded slowly. “Yes, I can see that. And Jotunn are not the monsters of gory legends amongst Midgardians. Well… you may proceed. If I may touch you similarly.”

“Fine by me.”

Loki slowly rolled over onto his other side to face Tony, and Tony’s fingers trailed over Loki’s smooth, patterned skin. Loki was completely hairless, Tony noted, even down at his groin. There wasn’t much to see down there as yet – Loki had angled his legs to conceal the region, one knee bent as the leg on top concealed the area from view. But the glimpse he’d caught of Loki’s groin was of smooth dark-blue skin and had been lacking in any obvious erection. Loki’s eyes were wary; waiting for the catch, perhaps, or for Tony to change his mind.

Tony shuffled closer, still lying on one side, now face to face with Loki. Tony’s erect cock pressed against Loki’s belly as he lowered his head to suckle some more on Loki’s neck. His teeth bit gently into the tough skin. Loki hissed in pleasure as his head lolled back, and Tony felt a cool hand slide tentatively over his hip and smooth across his ass.

“Your scars – were they from our battle when I threw you through a window?” Loki asked. His hand smoothed down Tony’s scarred back and started kneading gently at Tony’s butt.

Tony lifted his head away from Loki’s throat to answer. “No. Torture. In Afghanistan. I wasn’t very co-operative, and my captors didn’t appreciate that. I don’t want to talk about it. Go read about it on the internet later if you’re curious; that’ll give you the gist, at least.” Not that the papers would tell him much more. He’d barely even talked about the burns and whippings with Pepper, and never with a reporter.

“I understand,” Loki replied, and the grave, haunted look in his eyes made Tony think that he really might. Perhaps those myths about Loki’s lips being sewn shut were true.

He gave Tony a tentative kiss which deepened into a passionate one. Tony wondered if he’d ever made out before in his Jotunn form. Possibly not.

Tony’s hands roved Loki’s patterned skin. It wasn’t cold but… perhaps slightly lower than typical human skin temperature. The patterns were thickest on his face, arms, and chest, but faint traceries covered his whole body. “Are the lines natural or some kind of ritual scarification?”

“Natural,” Loki said. Loki pushed his arm in between their bodies and wrapped his cool hand firmly around Tony’s cock.

Tony hissed and arched up into his hand, leaning backwards slightly to give him more access. “Oh yes!”

Loki slowly pumped his hand up and down Tony’s firm length, and Tony groaned with pleasure. “Mmm, yes, more of that. And what can I do for you, then?” he purred.

His own hand trailed downwards, sliding between Loki’s tightly clenched thighs which parted slowly – ever so slowly – to give him access.

Tony wasn’t so lost in a daze of lust to miss the nervous look in his partner’s eyes.

“You don’t have to if you’re–”

 _Don’t say ‘scared’_ , he thought to himself.

“–not interested in that,” he concluded, hand stilling on Loki’s inner thigh.

Loki glanced away, as if Tony’s artistic black-and-white aerial photograph of New York hanging from a wall was suddenly of immense interest.

“I am… curious,” he conceded. “However, I am neither… It is different. And the lights are still on.”

“We can turn them off if you’re… shy,” Tony offered.

Loki’s lips thinned as if he took offense to that word, even though it was better than ‘scared’.

“I am no blushing maiden,” he said, snapped.

Loki’s thighs eased apart further, as if in proof, and Tony took the opportunity for a curious look.

There was a penis down there, of sorts, though perhaps it could be better described as a large clitoris. About three or four inches in length, it looked firm and erect as it peeked out of a large hood covering the top, the tip flushed a deep bluish-purple. The hooded covering of skin parted at the base of the organ, and wrinkled labia – or a divided scrotum – hung on either side at the base of the organ. They looked heavy and swollen and were dusted with a very light amount of dark hair.

Tony reached a hand slowly towards the short length, and Loki’s red eyes widened as Tony’s hand brushed along his small cock. The underside of the cock had a furrow in it, which deepened towards the base into a cleft which ran between the heavy labia. Tony suspected there might be some kind of vaginal opening down there amongst the folds of skin but concentrated on his stimulation of the small cock for now.

“How does this feel? Would you like me to go down on you?” he offered.

“Yes,” Loki said, his voice sounding strangled. “But I will not kneel for you.”

Tony shrugged. “That’s okay, you don’t have to.”

He pushed Loki gently onto his back and shuffled down the bed to kneel between Loki’s legs. Loki jerked at the first touch of his tongue, then lay rigidly still, hands clenched at his sides. Tony picked up one of Loki’s hands and put in on his head. Loki’s fingers uncurled then began carding through Tony’s short dark hair. The other hand soon followed suit, and Tony hummed happily to feel the hands toying with his hair.

Tony suckled on the tip of the cock, then flicked across it with his tongue. There didn’t seem to be a distinct head or penis-like ridge, it was all smooth skin across the tip. The hood-like foreskin was very sensitive, and when he nibbled at it gently with his teeth Loki groaned in pleasure, his hands clenching around Tony’s head. Tony bobbed up and down slowly, taking Loki’s cock to the root and moving the foreskin back and forth with his tongue as he did so, and dipping his tongue to trace the furrow on the underside.

Loki’s breath shuddered, and after a while Tony pulled off to grin at Loki, before diving back down to lap at the grooved base of his cock. There was a slit below it, and Tony’s tongued it experimentally. The folds parted slightly beneath the pressure of his tongue, and he tasted a musky sweetness.

“No,” Loki growled. He tugged sharply at Tony’s head, pulling him upwards. “Enough! I am not a woman!”

“Ow,” grumbled Tony. “I do understand ‘no’, you know.”

Tony’s hard cock pressed against Loki’s leg as Loki yanked him upwards, making Loki’s scarlet eyes look wild. Tony didn’t know if it was excitement or fear. Perhaps it was both.

“It’s alright,” Tony said soothingly, moving to lie next to Loki, unwrapping Loki’s hands from his hair and moving to lie next to him. “You have the right to say ‘no’ whenever you like, and we can stop, or do something else. What do you want to do? I’m versatile – I’m up for pretty much anything.”

Loki’s form shimmered and changed back to his dark-haired Asgardian form. “I don’t want to be an experiment! And I do not want to be treated as a woman, for I am not one.”

“Of course you’re not,” Tony agreed. “So, do you want to top, then?”

“What?”

“Do you want to fuck my ass?” Tony asked, eyes bright as he smiled seductively at Loki, who looked rather shocked. “I bet you want to. Do you want me to suck your cock, then stretch myself out for you, so you can bend me over and fuck me hard?”

“You want me to do that to you? You ask for that with no shame?”

“Sure, it’s fun and it’s been ages. Try and aim for the prostate, yeah?”

Tony ran a hand over Loki’s chest while Loki considered that. His chest in his more familiar Asgardian form was smooth and hairless as his Jotunn form had been, and his nipples a dusky pink. Tony tweaked one experimentally, but Loki looked curious rather than aroused like he had been in his Jotunn form, so Tony just moved on, sliding his hands over Loki’s hips and ass, which got an indrawn gasping breath which was much more promising.

“You do not expect me, an unmanly ergi sorcerer, to lie beneath you?” Loki checked. Loki reached out in turn, going straight for Tony’s buttocks which he kneaded firmly, fingers digging in but not to the point of pain. He shifted so their cocks rubbed together, and Tony groaned appreciatively at the smooth slide of Loki’s cock against his. He’d missed this.

“Honestly, I had you pegged as a top,” Tony said.

“A what?”

“Someone who prefers to be the dominant, penetrative partner during sex. All that ‘kneel before me’ stuff in Germany. You don’t like to top? I don’t mind, I’ll do either. I’m a switch; like I said, I’m versatile.”

“You are not ashamed to lie beneath a man? Or do you not regard me as a true man?”

Loki’s green eyes looked at him warningly, but Tony knew the answer to this one without the threatening gaze.

“You say you’re a man, that’s good enough for me. Is this some dumb Asgardian culture thing tripping you up? Because I have to say, the Norse had some good points in their culture for women’s rights, but some fucked up attitudes to gay men. Down here on Midgard we’ve got some good sexual liberation going on, Rudolph. It’s okay to be different to the other reindeer, and no-one’s going to make fun of you.”

“You are mocking me right now,” Loki pointed out. It didn’t stop him grinding against Tony, though. Both of them were breathing heavily, rutting gently as they talked.

Tony blinked. “Oh, yeah. A bit, I guess. But like, not about what you want to do in bed. I’m trying to say you can say what gender you are and anyone who’s not a dick is going to be fine with that. Which admittedly, is more people than it should be, but life isn’t perfect. And no-one is going to give a flying fuck whether you prefer to top or bottom in bed. Even the gay-hating bigots won’t give a damn – they’ll judge you for being gay no matter whether you’re a giver or a taker – that whole antiquated thing where if you top it doesn’t make you unmanly? Not a thing now, hasn’t been for centuries. If Thor got some pretty young man to bend over for him the bigots would be happy to spit on him and call him names just as much as if he was bottoming.”

“Fascinating,” Loki murmured. “But I would rather not talk about my brother in bed.”

“Fair.”

Tony pulled away. “Well, how about we fuck, then? I want you to grab some lube and a condom from the drawer, and I want you to fuck my tight little ass. What do you say?”

Loki tilted his head. “…Thank you?”

Tony snorted. Accidentally adorable. “Yeah, that’ll do.”

“What’s a ‘condom’ for?” Loki asked. “And the other thing?”

One swift sex ed lesson later, Loki watched with hungry eyes as Tony suckled briefly on his cock and then rolled a condom onto it. Sure, he shouldn’t _really_ be giving head without a condom on his partner, but he hated the taste of plastic and the risk of disease was less with oral than anal, especially when Loki hadn’t come yet.

Loki looked down at the plastic now engulfing his cock with curiosity.

Tony laid on his back with his knees up and apart and squeezed a glob of clear lube out onto his fingers. He reached between his own legs, rubbing around the pucker of his ass before pressing one lubed finger inside.

“It’s been a while,” he admitted, breathing out and trying to relax. He pushed a second finger inside, bearing down to help himself relax around the intrusion. He closed his eyes as he smeared some more lube around, inside and out.

As a warm mouth closed around his cock he bucked his hips in surprise, and his fingers slipped out.

Loki’s bright eyes looked up him mischievously, and his head bobbed as he sucked Tony deep into his mouth.

“Yes, beautiful, thank you, that’s so good,” Tony babbled. “Suck me hard, Loki!”

Loki seemed to know exactly what to do, swallowing Tony’s cock deep into his throat. His teeth were carefully out of the way, and the pressure of his lips and tongue was firm and exciting as the skin of Tony’s cock slid back and forth as Loki fellated him. The suction was wonderful, just the right amount of firmness to provide a tight channel around his cock.

“Perfect, just perfect.”

Loki brought Tony to the edge of pleasure, making him gasp and babble Loki’s name as he felt the tension in his body rise, so very close to orgasm. But then Loki pulled off, leaving Tony gasping and frustrated.

“Oh my god, I was so close!” Tony complained.

“I wanted to stop,” Loki said, eyes watching him closely.

“Fine, whatever,” Tony sighed. “Mind if I wank? Or did you want to fuck me now? I’d rather the latter. Actually, you know what? Both is good. Shall we go for both? Or did you want to actually, you know, stop altogether? ‘Cause either way I’m going to wank but I can go to the bathroom if you’re done. Though I fucking hope you’re not.”

Loki blinked, and his lips curved up into a delighted, wicked smile.

“You do indeed talk a _lot_. I would love to fuck your ass now,” he purred. “Bend over for me, oh noble hero.”

“Yes, your royal soon-to-be-pain-in-the-ass highness,” Tony said, rolling onto all fours on the bed. “A bit more lube, okay?”

“I suppose that can be managed,” Loki said.

Tony heard the pop of the tube’s lid before smooth fingers were pressing gently into his ass. Two fingers, by the feel of it. He breathed out and pushed back against them, relaxing into the sensation. He knew from painful past experience that clenching was a _bad_ idea at this point. Relaxing was the key to fun anal; being fingered helped with that if you didn’t fight it, so he bored down. Loki thrust his fingers in and out a couple of times, then Tony felt the blunt head of a cock pushing into his ass.

“Slowly now,” he warned, as his asshole stretched around Loki’s cock. “Gently in, then as fast as you like once I’ve adjusted, alright?”

“Pushy for one on the bottom, aren’t you?” Loki observed, but he paused for a moment in his entry, waiting for Tony to adjust and relax before pushing in deeper.

“Do unto others.”

“Do unto others what?” Loki asked. His hands gripped Tony’s hips as he started thrusting slowly in and out. “Mmm, you’re warm and tight.”

“Uh, it’s part of a saying,” Tony said, finding it hard to concentrate. Loki felt so large inside him. It had been too long since he’d felt so filled, and the thrill of the forbidden was exciting him. He _really_ shouldn’t be having sex with _Loki_ , of all people. His breath came faster as he pushed back against Loki’s pelvis with every drawn-out thrust.

“Do to people what you’d like them to do to you. That’s what it basically means. So, uh, what I was saying?”

“That I’m the god of sex?”

“God, yes. New domain, all yours,” Tony swore, with a huff of breath as Loki thrust in just that little bit deeper, pulling Tony onto his cock with the firm grasp on Tony’s hips yanking Tony back against him.

“Something else, what was I saying? Right. That you’d want to be asked what you like when you’re bottoming, right? So I… uhh…. yes… I can too. Consideration, that’s where it’s at. So everyone has fun. That’s why sex is for.”

“Fun? Not just release?”

“Aren’t you having fun?” Tony asked, looking back over his shoulder. Loki. Naked. An eyebrow quirked and a grin on his face. He was sweating lightly, a few drops beading on his brow and chest as he pistoned in and out of Tony’s ass.

“I suppose I am. You are a… less dominant partner than I pictured.”

“I could tie you up and tell you you’re a bad boy if you prefer?” Tony offered. His cock twitched with enthusiasm at that idea. He pictured Loki’s ass all tender and red from being spanked, the mouthy god gagged and hog-tied and completely at his mercy.

“Not really, no. This is… lovely.”

Pity. Maybe another time.

“Oh yes, right there, that’s the spot,” Tony said, groaning as Loki’s cock pushed against his prostate. “Just that angle right now.”

“Bossy.”

“Communicative,” Tony corrected. “If you bottom for me, you can tell me what uh… you like too.”

Loki made a thoughtful hum of agreement, and his pace sped up. Soon neither of them felt like lengthy conversations.

“Harder! Right there! Fuck me Loki!”

“You like me fucking you?”

“Yes, do it! Come for me, you magnificent bastard!”

Loki’s hands clenched tight enough to leave bruises on Tony’s hips, and he groaned as he came. Tony wasn’t long behind him. Afterwards, Loki leaned on Tony’s back, lightly sweaty and surprisingly heavy, and reached around to wank Tony’s cock.

“Your turn now. Come for me, soft cat. Come, smith, let me see you fall apart with your enemy’s cock in your pretty ass,” Loki purred, whispering right into Tony’s ear. He had the best bedroom voice, sultry and suggestive; every word felt twice as dirty as it should and the combination of his firm pumping hand and his ongoing litany of filthy words drove Tony to a feverish completion.

Tony spurted his orgasm onto the sheets with a drawn-out guttural groan of satisfaction. “Ohhh yes!”

Once the last twitches of his cock died down, Loki pulled out of Tony’s ass and eyed the full condom curiously. Tony waved an exhausted hand in the direction of the bin, and rolled onto his back on his bed, avoiding the wet spot. Loki moved away to dispose of the condom.

“Tissues,” Tony mumbled, waving another hand, this time at the box on the bedside table.

“I am not your _maidservant_ ,” Loki huffed.

“Just pass them to me, I’ll clean up.”

A box hit his chest with a thump. “Oof.”

Still sunk in post-orgasmic lassitude, Tony tiredly grabbed a handful of tissues and scrubbed them through the damp patch, then chucked both the dirty wad and the box of tissues over the edge of the bed. His cleaning staff had seen a lot worse. They’d cope.

“Good enough,” he pronounced. He looked around the room for Loki, who was standing off one side of the bed, gazing out the window. His stance was straight and his hands clasped behind his back in an almost military-like pose. He looked rather regal, despite being buck naked. “Are you coming back to bed, or are you leaving?”

“What would you prefer?”

“It’s not dawn yet,” Tony said, and his jaw dropped in a massive yawn. He smacked his lips together sleepily. “Come to bed and snuggle for a while.” Tony patted the mattress invitingly.

Loki hesitated, then turned and came back to bed, lying down cautiously.

“I won’t bite,” Tony promised. “Well, not unless you ask nicely.” He wrapped his legs around Loki’s and an arm around Loki’s back, and drew him in snug and close like an affectionate octopus. He maneuvered them both around until Loki’s head was resting on Tony’s chest.

“What are you doing?”

Tony looked at him in confusion. “Snuggling?”

“Then what?”

“I fall asleep? If you’re worried about dawn, don’t sweat it, Jarvis will remind us, won’t you? Wake-up call for half an hour before dawn, Jarvis.”

“Certainly, sir,” Jarvis’ British tones assured him. “And may I relay the gist of your plans to Ms. Romanoff who is waiting for an update?”

“Sure,” Tony said.

Loki snorted. “That’s it? What’s the matter? Performance issues?”

“Hey! No. Funny, but no,” Tony said, with a brief huff of grudging laughter. “Look, I’m over forty, my stamina’s good but not good enough for a second round at two in the morning right after the first, Loki.”

“Why. Are. You. _Snuggling_. Me?” Loki asked, every word distinct and bitten out.

Tony sighed. “Didn’t we have fun? Just relax, Loki. Enjoy the moment and pretend we’re a happy couple. It will go wrong, it always does for me. Always. Betrayal, and bitter heartache, and a cold and lonely bed once more. Sometimes people throw things. Sometimes at my head. But for right now, just… pretend. You’re reputed to be the god of lies, Loki Silvertongue, so you should be a good actor. So just for now, pretend with me that we’re happy and content, and let me stroke your hair while you lie on my chest, like you care for me, and I care for you. We had a fun time together and neither of us tried to kill the other or do anything horrible. So, use that as your motivation… get in character.”

Loki hummed thoughtfully and let his head sink back down on Tony’s chest and left shoulder, his arm wrapping across Tony’s stomach. Tony’s left hand reached up to toy gently with Loki’s hair, brushing it off his forehead and scratching gently at his scalp. Loki relaxed into his arms just a little bit further.

“I could pretend for a while,” he conceded. “For your sake, of course. I don’t like to cuddle.”

Instantly contradicting his words, perhaps, his head nuzzled into Tony’s chest gently as his hand smoothed along Tony’s waist. Tony kissed the top of his head. Loki froze for a moment, then relaxed again with a sigh.

“Of course not, fierce god like you. Do it for me, though.”

“I suppose I can put up with it for just one night,” Loki said, shuffling his body in a little closer, tangling their legs together even more.

“The mistletoe will stay up for another week and a half,” Tony said sleepily. “Through Christmas and the week after. I’m good at decorating – well, I’m good at paying people to decorate – but I’m not so quick on the clean-up. It’ll be up until the day before New Year’s Eve. You can visit again, if you like. If you’re here for fun, and not for trouble. No kidnapping Vision; he’s my grandson in all the ways that matter.”

“You’re too kind, sir,” Jarvis said, his pleased voice coming over the hidden speakers. He sounded Britishly ‘chuffed’ to be implicitly designated as Tony’s son. It wasn’t the first time Tony had said something like that, but it seemed to make Jarvis happy every single time he heard such comments. Jarvis had taken to the role of being Vision’s fatherly mentor with great enthusiasm.

Loki was quiet, and Tony would’ve thought he hadn’t heard, if not for how the arm around his waist had almost imperceptibly tightened.

“Going to tell me what you wanted with my boy?” Tony asked.

“No. But it was necessary, so do not assume your charms have changed my mind. What I attempted to do must still be accomplished, for the greater good of the Nine Realms.”

“ _Greater good_ ,” Tony chanted, in a sepulchral tone.

Loki stared at him in bemusement.

Tony coughed. “Never mind. Pop culture reference. Two, if you count ‘Harry Potter’ as well as ‘Hot Fuzz’. So, will you visit again? I can try harder to get you to talk when I’m not dead tired and slightly drunk.”

He’d have to hide Vision until this all blew over, whatever it was. Seemed like it was going to continue to be an issue.

“Why should I visit again?” Loki asked. “It does not sound very tempting. What inducements do you offer for the gift of my company?”

“Sex. With a genius, billionaire, playboy philanthropist. Seriously, I have to talk you into this? I’m awesome.”

“You are less irritating than most mortals, and less dull-headed,” Loki conceded.

“I’m flattered,” Tony said dryly. “See you on Monday, then?”

“Sir, you have a board meeting on Monday followed by meetings with entrepreneurs until seven o’clock,” Jarvis reminded him.

Tony sighed. “Tuesday evening,” he corrected. “We’ll have Thai food. I love Thai food.”

He massaged Loki’s back and the arm draped over his chest absent-mindedly. Loki was too tense.

With another yawn, Tony started to drift off to sleep in the silence, arms wrapped around his former enemy. Who might be his enemy again tomorrow but was his snuggly pillow for tonight. He wasn’t too worried; Jarvis would keep watch and had countermeasures under his computerized control in case one of Tony’s bedroom partners turned nasty in the night. Jarvis had insisted after that fiasco with the spy.

“I will see you on Tuesday, then,” Loki murmured at last just as Tony was almost asleep, pressing a soft kiss onto his chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Constructive corrections welcome! :) My usual beta is busy over the holidays and won't be available to look this over until January. I've edited as best I can, but typos are sneaky things sometimes.
> 
> I hope everyone enjoyed my holiday gift fic. ^.^


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